Dolly Parton + Potential New Boyfriend = SOLID GOLD!

When I was a youngster with my age still in the single digits, I lived for Barbara Mandrell & The Mandrell Sisters (see my previous tribute), Janie Fricke (more on her later) and the legendary Dolly Parton.

My parents had a VCR when they were still pretty pricey, not to mention top-loading. The VHS video tapes were expensive too, and I had 2 of my own. These tapes had episodes of the Mandrell Sisters show and various other things I had recorded. Of course, they were recorded on EP mode, so I could get 6 hours per tape. If I wanted to tape over something, I had to carefully navigate around the bits I wanted to keep.

1983 was a particularly good year for music. Dolly released the #1 smash hit "Islands In The Stream," a duet with Kenny Rogers, written and produced by The Bee Gees. But her lesser known hit, "Potential New Boyfriend," is my favorite Parton song of all. It's pure '80s pop pleasure! Incidentally, PNB was written by Steve Kipner, who also wrote "Physical" for Olivia Newton-John, and, as I just discovered, the recent "Live Like We're Dying" by American Idol's Kris Allen.

Another '80s pop pleasure is the cheesy yet awesome Solid Gold! All the pop gems you could consume were neatly packaged into an hour-long countdown featuring all the stars of the day as well as some crazy dancers. I remember being particularly fascinated by Rex Smith's nearly painted-on pants!

So imagine my 8-year-old excitement when Dolly appeared on Solid Gold two weeks in a row performing "Potential New Boyfriend!" One week, she wore a ruffled off-the-shoulders yellow top and a wooly red skirt with a zig-zag hem. Very country! But the other week, Dolly wore this black, leather-like sex vixen ensemble, complete with her own painted on pants.

Both appearances were lovingly recorded on one of my two video tapes, but some way, some how, after many viewings, they got recorded over! I'm sure little screams of horror rang through our house! In recent years, I had searched for these performances on YouTube, but to no avail.

Finally, I was able to squeal with glee when I found this! Watch and appreciate the 1983 fabulosity of it all!

Madonna & Lourdes: Second Coming

If you loved Nadya Ginsburg and Selene Luna in their last Madonna & Lourdes send-up, check out their new Madge & Lola vid:

On A Night Like This

Maybe I should title this post "Wow wow wow wow!!!" I just saw Kylie Minogue live for the first time. She's been performing for over 20 years, but tonight she began her first North American tour. Just hours ago, she hit the stage for opening night at the Fox Theatre in Oakland, California. I had wondered for so long if this day would ever come. It's unbelievable that it finally did!

I staked out a prime spot on the general admission floor area and chatted up a few new friends. I was up close and personal as "Minnie" performed most of her hits, including several songs from her latest album, X.

But the biggest surprise was the inclusion of a brand new song, "Better Than Today." Kylie mentioned that she was doing something for the first time, introducing a song that will be included on her upcoming album!! Such a catchy, cute number too. But you can judge for yourself. Thanks to 12345Speakerphone for posting this.

Check out Kylie's Tour Blog for inside info and her thoughts on the whole experience. Next stop for me: the Hollywood Bowl on Sunday! More Minogue madness! I can't wait!

Coug-ratulations Courteney Cox...

...on a hilarious new show!! (Okay, that heading was so cheesy I should set it out to catch mice!) Here are my first thoughts on ABC's new Wednesday night comedies.

Modern Family: moderately amusing. There were a few laughs, but for the most part, it left me wanting more. I really want to like this show. They sucked me in with the following lines of dialogue in their promos:

Gay #1: "Why is our daughter dressed like Donna Summer?"

Gay #2: "Clearly she is Diana Ross from the RCA years!"

Only a true diva fanatic can appreciate that part of the 1980s that brought us such Miss Ross gems as "Mirror, Mirror," "Muscles," "Pieces of Ice," and the Ross/Barry Gibb/Michael Jackson collaboration "Eaten Alive."

The first episode of "Family" contained no such gems. Guess I'll have to wait for the episode with the bewigged adopted baby.

Cougartown, on the other hand, was a riot! Ten times better! Granted, I may be a bit biased. I spent 10 years invested in the goings-on of Courteney Cox & crew on Friends. But Cougartown is a refreshing adult comedy!

So much is sanitized these days that I was giddy with glee at the dirtiness "CT" got away with! As Jules, Courteney is jumping back into dating/preying on younger men. One of the first episode's delights was the intimate moment our protagonist gets caught in, and the fruit she is subsequently forbidden from eating!

It seems our gal Jules is a successful real estate agent. The sexy photo on her signs inspires the lust of a neighborhood tween boy. I'm assuming she's successful because, as a sign maker, I know those signs would've cost a pretty penny. They're larger than average size, with a full-color photo, and made of material strong enough not to bend when being used to beat someone over the head!

I say it was a slam-dunk for Court and Cougartown on premiere night. Let's hope they keep it up!!

Am I a Hoarder?

I love the A&E show Hoarders! I have always been a bit of a packrat. I'm not sure if I enjoy Hoarders so much because I relate to the people or because I can watch it and think, "At least I'm not that bad!"

I'm a TV junkie, and as VHS video tapes got cheaper, my collection grew. I didn't have to record over things! I could save them for a rainy day!

The digital age that we now live in is my rainy day. Do I really want to convert those hundreds of tapes to mpeg or avi format? (Incidentally, if anyone knows the best digital video format for achieving small file size with decent quality, let me know! I use both PC & Mac, but I'll save that story for another time.)

Square footage is a hoarder's (or packrat's) worst enemy. The more space you have, the more crap you can amass! I can certainly attest to that. My current home is fairly large, but if/when I move to LA, I'm sure I will have a much smaller living space.

Soon, I will start the journey down the endless miles of video tape. "Oh I would watch 500 miles and I would watch 500 more..." If I can downsize, I'll be ready to move when the opportunity arises. Soon. I'm off work next week...

Andy Rooney can relate:

Doing It with Margaret & Luna & Ginsburg!

Recently (August 20 to be exact), I was "Doing It with Margaret Cho," as well as Ian Harvie, Selene Luna and Nadya Ginsburg. Margaret had no voice at all and was under strict doctor's orders not to speak, so her friends and fellow performers lent her their voices. They read her material, even doing the voices of her mom and Cyndi Lauper, while Margaret pantomimed. Hilarious!

You may know Luna & Ginsburg from their Madonna & Lourdes YouTube video. They even did a take on it at the show last Thursday. Selene & Nadya were super sweet, posing for this shot with me after the show.

They also suggested I take in Jackie Beat's "Better Than Nothing?" show, which I did the following night. Jackie, Nadya & Selene star in "Cher & Chaz," exec-produced by Roseanne Barr! Check out episodes 1 and 2 below. I love Selene so much! You will sh!t when you see her!

"Available at Target!" I love it! Nadya's Cher voice is just as great as her Madonna voice! Of course, they address Chastity's transition to Chaz in episode 2:

Kathy Griffin Roasts Joan Rivers!

Two weeks ago, I had a gay ol' time at the Kathy Griffin concert in Fresno. She mentioned that the following night, she would be hosting the Joan Rivers Roast. In old school comic style, a roast is when a performer is really raked over the coals. The roasters say all the things commentators normally stop shy of. Oh yes... they go there!

Roast of Joan Rivers	Sun, Aug 9 10pm / 9c
Preview - Kathy Griffin
www.comedycentral.com
Live Twitter Roast Roast Master Kathy Griffin Zombie Paparazzi Game

I was maybe 11 or 12 years old when I got Joan's LP "What Becomes a Semi-Legend Most?" Some of the jokes went over my head, as I was a sheltered young boy growing up in Visalia, CA. But this record, along with Bette Midler's "Mud Will Be Flung Tonight!" shaped my burgeoning comic psyche. It's a damn funny album!

Back in the day, what happened at a roast stayed at the roast. But fortunately, for us, that's no longer the case! The Joan Rivers Roast airs tomorrow night on Comedy Central... uncensored! Check out this preview:

Roast of Joan Rivers	Sun, Aug 9 10pm / 9c
Extended Preview
www.comedycentral.com
Live Twitter Roast Roast Master Kathy Griffin Zombie Paparazzi Game